well, i did say i would talk about music on this blog. and in follow up to my last “into it” column, here’s another song that pretty much just came out but is already going to be a new obsession. i’ve been looking forward to this one, from nicole sabouné – “so far out”, off her upcoming album ana.
i’ve come to know her work through the random bastards collective based out of sweden and this song, and the concept and making behind it is interesting to me. nicole tells her story of her exploring her family heritage by travelling to lebanon, a place she had never been before. i like the themes of feeling one’s bloodline calling back to something a little deeper, something a little more ancient, a way of knowing that exists within each of us that we may not be fully aware of.
the thing is, i truly get this feeling. i’m a mixed race person – my mother is ukrainian and my father was anishinaabe/ojibwe from a small reservation in northwestern ontario. only as i’ve gently began to explore both side of my bloodline, have i begun to understand myself.
nicole echoes this experience quite masterfully, and i really like “oh i let my feelings lead the way, oh, i’m so in love“. the accompanying music is a little bit chaotic but has this underlying almost 1980s kind of post punk/goth beat going that reminds me of lot siouxsie and the banshees, specifically “hong kong garden” and oddly, the cult.
it’s a really neat track and it leaves me hungry to hear the upcoming album. i’m really interested in reclamation and honouring of not only one’s ancestors but one’s deep ancestral self, not simply “i”, but rather the i that is “we”, that is “us”, that is held within family and place, and land.
as i began my own journey to self knowledge, one of my elders told me that the land will know and hold us, even when we do not know ourselves or don’t know yet how to hold ourselves in the deep reverence that we all should. i think it’s meaningful when music speaks to these kinds of deep personal experiences, especially when we are seemingly swimming and adrift in a sea of content slop brain rot.
i also appreciate nicole’s spoopy goth stylings. we live laugh love a goth babe in this house.
maybe i can’t stress it enough in a simple blog post, but these lines hit like a sledgehammer:
“I’m so far out
Hey, my feelings lead the way
And now I’m living it out
Hey, and if I know myself it will never go away
I feel that something within me
Has changed now
I don’t know what it is
And I don’t know how
Oh, the world will now see it
How I’m changing
Into someone else
I won’t let down“
intense.
links: youtube, spotify, instagram
hospital vespers 